


Good Intentions

by koalathebear



Category: Battlestar Galactica (2003)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-16
Updated: 2013-02-16
Packaged: 2017-11-29 11:13:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/686322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koalathebear/pseuds/koalathebear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spoilers: Up to and including Pegasus, speculative after that</p><p>Based on canon assumptions and not any of my existing Dark Ship scenarios. This is a non-shippy-esque "what if Apollo visited Sharon post-Pegasus" story.  I found the spoilers floating out there confusing so am not trying to do anything fancy here. Unbeta'ed.  Helo and Tyrol are still alive and imprisoned on the Pegasus, Apollo doesn't have 'feelings' for Sharon. Creators of icons are in the file name - right click and save as to view.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Good Intentions

"What do you want, sir?" Sharon sat on her bed, cross-legged, staring down at the blanket. Her ponytail was loosening and her hair fell over one shoulder. Her voice was flat and unemotional. "Zoo's visiting hours are over for the day".

Apollo was leaning against the wall. He was as still and watchful as she was silent and unmoving.

Not for the first time, he tested how he felt about her and all the things she had done, moving the thoughts around in his head, examining his feelings.

He had spoken to Adama earlier that day about the notion of visiting "the prisoner".

"How do you feel about her, sir?" Apollo had asked quietly.

"She has the same eyes as the one who shot me," Adama had said slowly. "She has the eyes of someone I cared about".

"She's a machine".

Adama had looked at his son. "She was more than that to us. She was more than that to me. She was a vital, living person… aboard my ship for almost two years. She served with you. You played Triad with her - I saw you laughing with her. She couldn’t have been just a machine. Could we have cared for a machine?"

"They're complex and sophisticated machines - manipulative," Apollo said, trying to shrug it off. "You tried to choke her to death on Kobol. Remember?" Apollo had pointed out, his light eyes curious. 

He wanted to know how Adama felt about the Cylon. Perhaps it would provide some guidance as to how _he_ felt. His feelings towards the prisoner had been very mixed and ambivalent since Kobol. She was complicated and problematic and he understood the troubled expression on his father's face.

"I don't take betrayal well from those I love .... you know that, Lee," Adama had said meeting his son's eyes evenly. To Apollo's own surprise he hadn't flinched and simply met his father's steady gaze thoughtfully.

"Have you forgiven this one? Is _this_ recalcitrant to be permitted _her_ redemption?" Apollo had asked coolly.

"She hasn't asked for forgiveness or redemption," Adama had told him.

"I don't think I did either. Not in words, anyway".

"We're not talking about you".

"We're not?"

"No," Adama had told him, taking off his glasses and putting them on the table. "She's more than a machine ..... but less than a human".

"What's your point?"

"I don't know why she does what she does. Why did she help us find the Tomb?"

"Surely that's simple. It was a ploy to to earn our trust," Apollo had told him. "Just the same as when she helped us to stop the Cylon virus".

"I was there, Lee. That particular effort cost her a great deal both mentally and physically".

"You sound like you're starting to believe her, dad". Apollo had noted.

"I believe that she had her reasons ...if we can isolate what they are and if we can establish that they are consistent with our interests .... "

"When we were kids you said that all the effort and good intentions in the world didn't add up to a frakking thing if you didn't get results," Apollo had mused. "Isn't it the end result that counts? Success? Are intentions really important at all? Surely if you think you can use her - just use her. Why do we give a frak about the why?"

He was still standing before his father's table, almost but not quite at attention. Despite everything they had gone through, the distance was still there. Unspoken words, painful memories, unclarified misunderstandings and hurtful experiences always seem to be present at every encounter, proving to be almost a physical barrier that could never be resolved.

"Intentions and motives aren't the same". Adama had told him.

Apollo's mouth had twisted. He gave a short laugh. "I see. All the good intentions in the world mean nothing if you don't succeed but if you have a questionable motive, even if you succeed - then the success means nothing".

"I think you're twisting my words again, Lee. I think I also said that we're not talking about you," Adama had said quietly.

"Yeah, I get that," Apollo had countered. "What are we talking about then? What is it you want me to do?"

"We need the prisoner's help. I can't deny that. It bothers me though that we still don't know what motivates her. I need you to talk to her".

"Me? Why me? There's no way she's going to talk to me - I've tried to shoot her on at least two occasions," Apollo had said with an incredulous look.

"Well she actually shot me once so that makes it even". Neither bothered to point out that it was the "other" one.

"You go and talk to her".

"Helo and Tyrol are held on the Pegasus, Crashdown's dead, Starbuck's also on the Pegasus ..... the next person who ever had much to do with her is you, Lee".

"Need I remind you that that was the other Sharon. Furthermore, although we worked together very closely, even then I clearly didn't know who or what the frak she really was. That one already had me fooled. I can't even pretend to understand this one".

"There are still similarities, Lee. I need to know what what she's thinking ... why she does what she does.... what's the extent to which we can trust her. Starbuck's got instructions to take out Cain if she can ... I'm not sure if she can do that. She doesn't know when Helo and Tyrol are scheduled to be executed. The Vice-President is still onboard the Pegasus.... if we can use a weapon we have at our disposal, then we use it. I need you to find out if we _can_ use it".

Apollo had exhaled slowly. "I can tell you now that she's not going to talk to me ..."

"Go and talk to her. There's one more thing you need to know about what happened to her," Adama had said and a flicker of grief and guilt had crossed his face - something which he controlled with great effort.

Apollo had looked puzzled.

"While you were assigned onboard the Pegasus ....."

Even remembering his father's words now Apollo found himself flinching.

"How can I help you, sir?" Sharon had been the one to finally speak and break the silence. She didn't look up. Her face was pale, there were dark shadows under her eyes and when she didn't speak, she kept her lips pressed tightly together as if to prevent sound or pain from spilling out. There shouldn't have been beauty in a grieving face, but nonetheless it was there.

"I'm not going to beat around the bush, Sharon. We're in a bad place right now. The Vice-President, Kara, Helo and Tyrol are still all trapped onboard the Pegasus".

"They're all still _alive_?" Sharon looked up, the first hint of emotion returning to her face, her dark eyes resting demandingly on Apollo's face. " _All_ of them?"

"Yes, they're alive ... as far as we know .... didn't anyone tell you? Sorry, stupid question," Apollo said, grimacing slightly, shifting slightly from where he leaned against the wall.

"No kidding," Sharon said, looking at him steadily. "So no doubt you're here to do the whole 'why you do the things you do' routine again. You know, I've been through this with the president, Dr Baltar, the commander at one point .... most of all I go through it with myself all the time ..."

"And what's the answer?" Apollo asked her.

"When you helped the president escape, what was your intention then? To piss off your father? Challenge his authority?"

"Okay we're not talking about me here, but since you bring it up - it was very important that the president go to Kobol. I made the call. My intentions were pure".

"Did you have any ulterior motives?" Sharon asked him. "To let your father know that he can't order you around like a little boy anymore? To let him know that you have your own mind and that you're prepared to follow your conscience even when it goes directly against military authority?"

Apollo stared at her. Her dark eyes were steady and unflinching.

"Since you're capable of distinguishing between the two, Sharon. Let's hear about _your_ motives and intentions".

Sharon tilted her head to one side, her face thoughtful. "Are your motives and intentions always capable of being summed up easily in one line, sir?"

"Quit playing around Sharon. To be honest, I don't really care if you're in it for your own survival, your unborn child, your imagined love for Helo, your residual imagined love for Tyrol. What I need to know is, when it comes down to it, who will you back? Cylon or human? Galactica or Pegasus?"

Sharon stared at him in disbelief, rage growing within her. 

Apollo ignored her look. "Furthermore, you can drop the sir. As a sign of courtesy it's meaningless, given the 'frak you' tone of your voice every time you use it. Apollo or Lee is just fine".

"With all respect, _sir_ ," Sharon said softly, the gentle fury in her voice like a vicious slap. "Like most humans you're such a frakking idiot that I don't see the point of explaining anything to you". 

She turned away from him and Apollo stared at her in astonishment. She almost looked offended that he had doubted her.

She hugged her arms around her knees and sank back into silence.

"Sharon ..." he started to speak and then swallowed hard. "I heard about what happened with Thorne ..."

"I don't talk about that with you," she said harshly, her voice abrupt and he flinched at the unshed tears in her voice.

"From what I hear you don't talk about that with anyone," he said finally.

"Well you should figure something out from that, _sir_ ," and a wealth of contempt and fury was encompassed in that word.

Apollo sighed and then without knowing what he was doing he went to crouch down beside her bed. Sharon stared at him in shock, not sure what he was doing.

"You're a prisoner of the Galactica .... what happened should never have happened. My father is more sorry than he can express .... and me .... I ...."

Sharon held up a hand. "I said I don't talk about it" She put her arms around herself and swallowed hard. Her eyes were shining with tears now. She shook her head. "Please, we don't talk about this .... I _can't_ talk about this ...."

Apollo felt as if he had been punched repeatedly in the stomach. He didn't know how to deal with this kind of pain. He wished that Starbuck was here .... it should have been another woman talking to Sharon, comforting her. Instead it was just him.

_She's a machine. How could we care about a mere machine?_

Could a machine feel comfort, Apollo found himself wondering. That would mean that it would have to have suffered pain and sorrow in the first place.

"Sharon ... this is really hard and ..."

"For _frak's_ sake!" Sharon said and within seconds she was on her feet, a chair in her hands and she was smashing the window of her cell repeatedly. "I told you, no! Get out! Get out! _Get out_!" she screamed, her voice cracking with the strength of her fury.

Apollo rose from where he was crouching and watched her release her rage and pain.

The guards came rushing in, rifles all aimed at Sharon who was standing trembling with emotion, the chair dropped to the ground and the shattered but intact window of her cell making cracking sounds.

Apollo held up a hand. "We're fine here, leave us alone," he told the guards.

"But sir, the prisoner's violent ... you're in danger ..."

"We're fine, leave us," Apollo said, gesturing them out of the room. He waited until the guards had left and he cautiously approached Sharon, slowly and tentatively as if she was a wounded animal that might turn on him and savage him if he made a wrong move.

"Sharon, I'm sorry ..." he said slowly. He didn't know how to deal with her silent, shaking sorrow but this uncontrolled rage, fury and anger was something he understood. The smashing of the chair against the window was something he understood.

"Stay back, sir," she said.

"You've got a chair and you're not afraid to use it?" he asked her, kicking the chair out of her reach. "I admit, you've got a certain technique ..." Her dark eyes were wary and suspicious, her breath coming raggedly as she stood before the cracked window.

He stepped closer, hands held up before him, palm up as if to show her that he meant her no harm.

He stood before her. They stood eye to eye.

"You know I kind of hate the fact that you're so tall - although the eye to eye thing has its advantages," he said dryly.

"I'm not tall, you're short," she told him.

"Nasty," he said. Without warning, he put his hands on her shoulders and she stared at him disbelievingly. He gave her a firm shake that made her head shake. 

"Get a grip, lieutenant. Pull yourself together". 

He shook her again and then released her.

Before she could speak, he continued. "I know that this isn't a minor inflight accident you're recovering from .... it's a trauma that's going to haunt you forever ... but lieutenant - you've got a mission. Pull yourself together, pick up the pieces, get off your ass and pull yourself together".

Sharon stared at him in shock, looking appalled at his insensitivity. "You've gone mad. I'm not a lieutenant anymore, I'm not on any mission .."

"We need you," Apollo continued as if she hadn't spoken. "You know that none of us can afford to look to our own problems at this time. So activate your Get Over It programming or whatever it is you need to do and get over it ..... we need you back with us. Helo and the Chief need you. _I_ need you".

"Galactica against Pegasus. Humanity against humanity. If you're still killing each other - why should I help? " Sharon asked him.

"I think you already know the answers to that Boomer," he said quietly, using her call sign deliberately and seeing the way her dark eyes widened. At the expression in her eyes he felt an emotion inside him that had been a mere flicker on Kobol, an emotion which he hadn't wanted to acknowledge or accept. He suppressed it ruthlessly now.

"Don't get me wrong, I've still got my doubts .... your people tried to wipe out humanity ..... yet we're still fighting among ourselves. You and ..." he smiled wryly. "The other you .... have put yourself on the line and helped ... more than helped, you've made a major contribution ... you're also a hell of a pilot despite your awful landings".

"Frak you," Sharon said without heat. "I could outfly you any time," she told him. 

Apollo gave a short disbelieving laugh. "I think not. I'll have you know that I recently managed to pilot a Pegasus Raptor, overpower the Pegasus CAG, steal said Raptor - bring it back home - all without breaking a sweat."

"Are you _bragging_?" she asked him disbelievingly.

"Are you impressed?" Apollo asked, smiling despite himself and Sharon found herself smiling back.

"Not in the slightest. Everyone knows once a Viper pilot, always a Viper pilot - jumped up testosterone and brainless machismo".

Apollo wasn't offended. "Think about it. We need you back ..... I can't promise that we'll be able to release you from here right away .... but we need you".

Sharon looked sceptical. "I don't believe you're suddenly convinced of my loyalties, sir".

"Of course not. I freely admit that I don't trust you 100%," he admitted smiling slightly. "Thing is - there are very few humans I trust 100% ..... life's a gamble and I think I've decided I'm willing to take a risk on you... your motives and your intentions," he said, his blue eyes very dark and serious as he looked at her.

"You're a smug self-satisfied son of a bitch," Sharon said, looking annoyed as she walked back to her bed. "Get out now".

"You're ruder than you used to be," Apollo said with a smile, still looking amused.

"Enough already, get out!"

Apollo signalled for the guards, his lips twitching despite himself as she glared at him. It was a very uncomplicated and pissed-off glare.

"I wouldn't put any money on it! Don't think of me as a sure bet!" Sharon bit out.

"Of course not, you're a woman, complicated and changeable," Apollo said as he walked out over the door.

"I mean it! Don't think you can read me so easily!" she said sounding extremely aggravated.

"Wouldn't dream of it, Valerii. You're an enigma shrouded by mystery, completely unfathomable. Later!" He told her, the door closing heavily behind him.

He stood at the thick glass, glancing at the cracked area with a wry twist of his mouth. 

Sharon looked up, knowing that he was watching her. Her dark eyes met his. "Go away!" she mouthed at him, her hand waving him away, annoyance still exuding from her in an entirely feminine reaction to his arrogant presumption that he could read her.

Apollo started to walk out of the containment area but then paused by the door where no one could see him. He exhaled slowly and disbelievingly as he rested his head against the wall.

"Frak. Please no". 

Clearly some evil spirit out in the universe had a wicked and frakked up sense of humour.

****

The End


End file.
